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Big Brother Recap – Not A Good Night For Ollies Or Lollies

August 29th, 2008 · No Comments

Sarah Walker

Welcome to a little game CBS likes to call BB Fast Forward Roulette, in which…. What? Leave off the ‘Roulette?’ I thought Dan was running CBS now? Not yet? Okay then.

Welcome to BB Fast Forward, in which we will have an eviction, HOH competition, nominations, POV competition and ceremony, and a second eviction all in the space of a live hour of rockin’ roller coaster pedal to the metal entertainment. Julie informs us that Dan’s actions at the POV have left the house in chaos. Here to confirm is Ollie in the Diary Room. He is “so angry that Dan back doored Michelle,” disrespected and mocked him. “He’s the biggest snake in the game!” To illustrate, BB shows Dan walking past Ollie in the living room wearing his shades, giving him a smug shrug. Ugh.

Dan interviews that his “goal was to cause utter chaos and confusion by the time the POV ceremony was over so there would not be a target on my back.” Say what? I’m not even going to try to follow that logic.

Jerry interviews “Ollie put a lot of faith in a man who couldn’t keep his word. Sure enough, Dan didn’t keep his word. My plan is to do and say absolutely nothing. I feel that Michelle will probably self destruct.”

And here’s Michelle self destructing in the Diary Room. It’s a tirade of anger and frustration requiring a great deal of audio censorship. In his session, Ollie tells us he believes Dan is “a snake and a plant.” “He is not a regular houseguest. There’s not a person in this world who would do half the things Dan has done and have a goal to win half a million dollars.”

Ollie, Michelle and Jerry regroup in the bedroom to vent their frustrations. Ollie decides it’s time to call Dan out. They find him in the backyard with Memphis and Keesha. Renny stands nearby. Ollie starts the ball rolling. Keesha immediately takes the bait, screeching at Ollie and Michelle “I know you two turned on me!” Michelle counters “He (Dan) told me to say your name!” Someone really needs to catch Keesha up on what’s going on here. The two girls get into it as Ollie repeatedly yells “Listen, listen” in vain. Michelle points to Dan and screams “He’s a plant in the house, and that football picture (Dan coaching at Michigan State) is a fake!” Dan is silent, Memphis is laughing into his hand, and Renny and Jerry take it all in from a safe distance.

As Ollie begins to outline the now infamous jungle vine deal in an attempt to expose Dan’s Mr. Hyde side to the others, Dan gets up and leaves. Ollie demands “Why you leaving?” Dan replies “I’m good. I don’t have to convince anyone.” Ollie tells the others “He gave his word on Monica and his family, and he’s running away!” As Dan closes the sliding door behind him, he says “Let the chaos ensue” and continues upstairs to hide in his room. Diary Room Dan asks us “Have you ever seen someone light a fuse to a bomb and stand by to watch it blow up?” Can’t say that I have, Dan. “No! I got the heck outta there!”

In the back yard, Ollie continues to insist that he was the de facto HOH this week. Memphis asks “What does that have to do with anything?” Ollie replies “He’s a plant, for one. He lied about putting her (Michelle) up, and he lied about the whole entire game!” Memphis retorts “Who gives a f***, I’m off the block.”

Ollie’s priceless reply is “Congratulations. I’ll give you a cookie.” Memphis interviews “Ollie definitely got played. The stuff that comes out of his mouth, especially these conspiracy theories – they are hilarious.”

In the back yard, Keesha is still at it: “If it were up to you guys, it’d be me on the block. So I can’t complain.” Ollie tells them “I just wanted you to know what you’re working with (ie, a snake). Memphis counters “What makes you think we didn’t know that?” Renny smiles at this, but remains quiet. Ollie, completely exasperated, shouts “I’m sick of y’all taking advantage of me being nice! I don’t want to see the nice of me no more!” Memphis tells him “Just keep walking away from me.” Ollie, again with the priceless reply: “Red-headed Cabbage Patch Kid!”

Ollie goes up to HOH where Dan is hiding. He asks “Why’d you play me for a fool?” Dan replies “It’s a game, man.” Ollie continues “You test my manhood (No Ollie, that was April, remember? And you passed), you disrespected me in front of millions of people (again – April).” Ollie goes on to warn Dan that he will not be keeping him safe next week. Gee, even Keesha could have figured that one out.

Keesha and Memphis have joined Dan, holed up in HOH. Renny comes in and gives Dan a stare down as she enters. Either Dan or Memphis says “Here it comes.” Renny asks “I mean, do you honestly think that was all necessary?!” Dan replies “I told you from the beginning, this week’s gonna get sticky.” Renny retorts “Dude, I’m getting too old for this s***!”

Their attention turns to the spy screen where they watch Ollie hurl a lolly pop against the wall. In a gratuitous display of sensationalism, BB zooms in for a close up of the pop’s pitiful remains. Ollie continues his mild rampage into the back yard, where he breaks a lamp, overturns a planter and disturbs some gym equipment. Something to do with restoring his stolen manhood, perhaps.

Dan is alone in HOH, abandoned by his fellow Tenacious Trio-ers and his Renegade. Speaking of stolen manhood, he’s still wearing his TAKEN shirt. Michelle rings the buzzer. Dan opens the door with “I’ll talk to you, but if you yell….” “Am I yelling?! I don’t understand, why did you do that to me, out of all the f’in people? I’m the one person in this house that hasn’t screwed you.” Dan weasels that the deal was too good to be true and Ollie shouldn’t have believed it in the first place. Michelle asks “Then why didn’t you put frickin’ Ollie up?” Instead of telling her the truth, that he’s more afraid of her than Ollie, Dan puts the blame on Ollie: “He gambled with your life.” She asks “It’s probably me going home?” Dan says “I don’t know, we’ll see what happens.”

Fighting back tears in the Diary Room, Michelle says “It’s not fun getting back doored for something you didn’t do.” She tells us it would have been better if Dan had told her she’s “a good player or something,” rather than the lame explanation he offered. “But I don’t believe anything that comes out of that kid’s mouth.”

With all the events to get through tonight – live – it’s surprising BB has devoted so much time to recapping the past couple of days. Julie finally gives the news about tonight’s double eviction to the HGs. Ollie, back on the Kool-Aid and deluding himself that Dan will face immediate retribution, claps. Time for pleas from the condemned. Jerry says he has seen a lot of ups and downs in 75 years. If he gets whacked tonight it’s a bump in the road. He’s had a great ride in life and in the house. Michelle is thankful to have been here. She asks the HGs to vote based on what is best for each of them.

The vote is three to one to evict Michelle, Ollie being her lone supporter. Julie delivers the news, Michelle makes a classy exit. Jerry gives her a hug and humorously tells her to “Stay in touch.” The remaining HGs run around getting ready for the HOH competition. Keesha asks “So HOH decides who leaves?” The others attempt to explain to her what Julie just told them, ’cause it’s soooo complicated.

Outside the house, Julie interviews Michelle. “Why do you think you became the target?” Michelle answers that she thinks she was the target all along. She believes Dan is a “plant;” something about him is “not right,” and he “tries to make a fool of everyone.” Julie assures Michelle that Dan is not a plant but a regular houseguest. “Oh – then he’s crazy.” Appreciative laughter from the live audience. Julie counters with “Maybe he is smart.” “No,” says Michelle, “because he’ll be the one sitting here in a few minutes.” Julie asks “Do you think he’s scared?” “I think he’s petrified.”

Time for the HOH competition; this one is called Big Brother Headlines. Julie gives the players their instructions: “Recently we asked viewers to answer a series of questions on based on imaginary headlines from the future. They voted for which houseguest they felt best fit each headline. I will read each headline and give the name of two houseguests, either Dan, Jerry, Memphis, Ollie, Keesha, or Renny. Your answer will be the name you believe received more votes from America.” One point for every correct answer; the most points after seven questions wins.

First headline: BB 10 Houseguest Gets Lost On Their Way Home From Work. Keesha or Jerry. Answer: Keesha

Second headline: BB 10 Houseguest Headlines National Comedy Tour. Renny or Dan. Answer: Renny

Third headline: BB 10 Houseguest Called a Hero After Saving Family From Burning Building. Dan or Ollie Answer: Dan (WTH?)

Fourth headline: BB 10 Houseguest Entrusted With National Security Secret. Jerry or Memphis. Answer: Jerry

Fifth headline: BB 10 Houseguest’s Life Story Made Into A Feature Film. Jerry or Renny. Answer: Renny

Sixth headline: BB 10 Houseguest Arrested By The Fashion Police . Memphis or Ollie. Answer: Memphis

Seventh headline: BB 10 Houseguest Beats Jessie In Arm Wrestling Competition. Dan or Keesha. Answer: Keesha

After seven questions, Jerry and Keesha are tied for the win. The tie breaker question is “When America gave you lolly pops, how many total lolly pops were displayed on the table after the food competition. Both guess 100. On to the tie-breaker breaker question. In the competition One Giant Leap (Astronaut Puzzle), if you add the winners’ times for heats one, two and three, what was the total time in seconds? Both are pretty far off, but Keesha is closer and is the new, brief HOH. Back in the house, she nominates Jerry and Ollie. Both take their seats without needing to be asked.

Up next, the POV competition: Veto in a Haystack. The HGs are wearing safety glasses and gloves. Hay bales are lined in rows in front of them, hurdles style, with a large haystack on the other side. Julie instructs the HGs “Buried in each of your haystacks are two veto medallions. On Go, sprint across the track, find the veto medallions and return them to your stand. But here’s the catch: you can only return one medallion at a time. The first person to retrieve both their medallions and ring their buzzer will win the POV.” Dan wins, Memphis is right behind him. Ollie and Jerry weren’t even in this one. Renny jumps on Dan in a monkey hug. Ollie sits on a hay bale looking despondent and kind of in shock.

At the veto meeting, the HGs are still panting from their roll in the hay. Julie invites Jerry and Ollie to make their pleas. Jerry basically says that he said everything when he was on the block for the first time this evening, just a few minutes ago. Ollie spits out a piece of hay, saying “It is what it is.” He invites Dan, who likes to play games – “Let’s play another game.” Dan says that although he appreciates each nominee’s statement, especially Ollie’s humor, he will leave the nominations alone.

Time to vote. Julie barely gets the words “By a vote of three to zero” out before Ollie almost sprints to the door. He throws a “good luck” over his shoulder and is gone. Jerry asks the others to talk to him. Memphis tells him “It’s all good, Jerry.” Dan ghoulishly stares at Ollie’s photo until it turns gray. He then invites Jerry to “talk on a personal level.” He knows that Jerry “had to play the game differently when they (Ollie and Michelle) were here.” Memphis adds that there aren’t teams anymore. Little does he know.

Ollie gets a Chen Chat. “I think that was the fastest exit in BB history – you just bolted. You knew when you heard ‘three to zero.’ How are you feeling?” Ollie says it’s still sinking in, he guesses it was his turn. “You look upset.” Ollie replies that he is a competitor and was somewhat disappointed in himself. He is thankful for the opportunity. JC persists “You’re upset at Dan.” Ollie replies that he is more confused than upset. Us too, Ollie. He continues “It’s worked out in his favor for now, but I don’t know how the other houseguests will feel about him now.” Julie likens Dan’s betrayal of Ollie to Ollie’s betrayal of Brian in week one. Ollie agrees, but doesn’t like that Dan brought the rest of the house in on it and that he “mocked” everyone. Finally, Julie asks about April. Ollie sees a “bright future” with her and plans “to keep her around as long as I can.” He hopes she won’t turn down his proposal – to be his first “official” girlfriend.

With his alliance in the jury house, Jerry needs an HOH win to have any hope. If he somehow pulls it out – and it’s not out of the question – it will be reality TV at its finest when the Tenacious Trio + Memphis are forced to cannibalize each other. Tune in Sunday to see what happens, and in the meantime keep up with it all on Media Fiends: – Devil’s Snare.

Tags: Big Brother 10